Ryan Is…

Remember when the internet was young? When babies danced, hamsters sang and there was nary a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in want of a baseball bat? Then you probably also remember the advent of Googling your first name followed by “is” to see what your tech-savvy namesakes were up to across the globe.

Well, finding myself with a rare free moment at work – and these days, we’re talking “finding a four leaf clover at the end of a rainbow on February 29 rare” as opposed to my typical and delicious “medium rare” – I decided to see what, exactly, the internet classifies me as being up to. The answer?

Crying while eating.

Yup, according to Google, I’m weeping while inhaling a can of whipped cream. Check out the search result here, then decide for yourself whether or not it’s accurate.