Green, And Card Shaped

I have my green card.

It’s kind of hard to believe that I haven’t mentioned it until now, but my postmodern heroic task finally came to an end while I was clearing out of Montreal and heading to China. That’s right, folks – I’m officially a permanent resident of the United States. And now that the half-decade of paperwork, fingerprinting and biometrics capturing is over, it feels kind of like it’s 12:01 on New Year’s – everything’s the same as it was before, but all of a sudden anything seems possible.

A huge thanks goes out to Bob and the Sommers Company for sponsoring me (immigration wise, not AA or anything) through the five-year process. Props also go out to my doctor for giving me the crucial “Not Insane” clearance necessary to stay in the country, and to Chels for enduring my constant interjections of “Oh for God’s– Do you have any idea how inaccurate this is?” when we watched GREEN CARD a few months ago.

The best part? I got from the beginning to the end of the process without entering into a sham marriage with Andie MacDowell. And don’t think for a second that she didn’t offer. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m expecting an avalanche of directing offers now that I’m free to live the American dream…which hopefully doesn’t involve zombies.